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Friday, January 27, 2012

Style Smothering. Tisk Tisk!

I recently had the privilege of having dinner with my beautifully stylish friend Allyson. Hanging out with her is always a fun time because she's fabulous and carries herself in that fashion.

As I sat outside the restaurant waiting for her, my phone buzzed with a text that read "I'm coming as fast as these heels while carry me." I chuckled to myself looking a little crazy to those passing by because that was classic Allyson; always refined and put together. A few seconds later, the clicking of her heels made their way to where I sat and I took in one of the chicest pairs of boots. (I'm definitely a sucker for boots). Giving her a compliment we hugged and proceeded to dinner where she explained she didn't really have a place to wear her boots because her husband disliked them. (Not just those, boots in general. Isn't it crazy how people influence what we wear?) I could totally relate. Before I started seeing my husband, I had a fabulous array of pumps, wedges, sandals, and what ever else you can think of. I was in shoe heaven. Month after month that changed and then four years later I looked at my shoe collection and almost gagged. It was made up of a selection of flats and flip flops. What had happened to the fashionista that was Vonae? The one who proudly walked around her university campus with heels everyday as if it were the norm?

I'll tell you what happened to her and most women. Her surroundings smothered her style.

My surrounding . . . oh how I detest it. I currently reside in Palm Beach County. A place nestled in South Florida about an hour north of Miami. We're known here for beaches, world class golfing, famous residents galore, food, and shopping; lots and lots of shopping. In fact we have some of the best shopping in all of the United States so how on Earth can my style be smothered?

You see, while we have the best selection of everything, we're also a much laid back type of town. Think Malibu/Los Angeles without the mountains. Everyone wears flip-flops as a normal part of their wardrobe and I've come to notice most people are just nonchalant about what they put on. Now this works to my advantage when I'm having a lazy day, but too many lazy days kills your inner fashion lover.

Yes, they've murdered me.

It wasn't until this past summer when my husband, myself, and a group of our closest friends went to New York for the week of 4th of July that I was reborn. I could wear whatever I pleased; be as dressed up as I wanted to be. Wear red lipstick! Gasp! And no one cared. They just nodded, smiled, or asked where I found my outfit. I was alive and I loved it.

That brings me to my point. How is your style going for you? Have you been smothered by your surroundings? Your boyfriend, husband, GIRLFRIENDS, (Oh yes they can be the biggest smotherers of all!) siblings, the city in which you live?

One thing my mom used to always say to me was "Why do you care what others think about what you're wearing. If you like it, that's all that matters."

And to that I say AMEN!

Our style is simply that, OURS! Why do we put so much emphasis on how others dress and then change ourselves according to that? If we want to wear heels everyday, we should wear heels everyday! If we want to get dressed but know we'll be way overdressed, we should go for it. There's nothing worse then suppressing your style and becoming someone you don't even recognize. Believe me, it can happen! It's time for us to stand up and stand out. Will you join me?

Here are some ways:

1) Pick out things you love. (Don't worry about what someone else will say about it. If it drew your eye, try it on and decide for yourself).

2) Don't allow others to stifle your style with their opinion. (One of our biggest downfalls as women is our need for approval. We always have to ask, "How do I look?" stop asking others. How do you think you look? If there's excessive skin showing or an outfit is unflattering, most of the time we know it. Take it off. You know what looks good on you and what's pushing the border into trashcan land.)

3) Be proud of your style and wear things you love with confidence.